AH, more questions that authors get…with perfectly rational answers.
Q: Is it okay if I come to your house and watch you write?
A: Is it okay if I give the FBI your address? By the way I’ve moved to Antarctica. Turn left when you see the marching penguins and you’ll be there. Don’t worry about dressing warm.
Q: Are you sensitive to bad reviews?
A: No. No. No. No. No. NO! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
A: Oh, you’re a writer? What do you do as a job?
Q: Writing is easy and doesn’t take much time and is really more of a hobby, so I spend the rest of my hours as a serial killer. What’s your address again?
Q: What is the most fun about being a writer?
A: I get to wear pajamas all day.
A: My only boss is my muse.
A: Playing jokes on people by naming characters after them. Like my friend Cheryl who complained that I never named any characters after her. So I invented Cheryl the Sasquatch for one of my books (true story).
Q: What is the worst thing about being a writer?
A: I wear pajamas all day. Even to readings.
A: My only boss is my muse but she’s seven feet tall and smokes cigars and demands 20,000 words a week and bacon. How much bacon is there in the world?
A: A real Sasquatch showed up one day. Her name was Cheryl. She was not happy that I turned her into a comical character. She was very good at MMSA (Mixed Martial Sasquatch Arts). I was not.